Friday, August 3, 2012

Your Highness Review

 File:Your Highness Poster.jpg

This movie sucks. Yeah, not a very intelligent way to start a review I understand, but it's true. I remember the trailer to this movie and how it actually seemed funny and witty and pretty good. Holy hell was I completely wrong. This isn't gonna be a long review.

Two princes, Thadeous (Danny McBride) and Fabious (James Franco) quest after the evil wizard Leezar (Justin Theroux) who kidnapped Fabious' fiance Belladonna (Zooey Deschanel), along the way they meet Isabel (Natalie Portman) who joins them.

That's it that is the whole plot. And while its a decent story, by God is it executed horribly. The writing is terrible, pacing is awful, and the directing is slap-shod at best. This movie is a complete waste of a great cast. Danny McBride who I think is a great comedic actor, and co-wrote the movie, tries his best to make it funny, but just can't do it. I understand his whole schtick is that he's kind of a douche in every role, but at least he's usually somewhat likeable, or at the very least funny. But not here, he's annoying self centered and has an ego so massive its ridiculous. He has some sort of rivalry with his brother even though his brother is as nice as he could possibly be to him. And here's the thing, he never changes. At no point does this character grow, through the whole movie, right till the end hes the same annoying arrogant douchebag.

Honestly, I'm not sure why James Franco is in this movie. Maybe as a favor to director David Gordon Green(who directed Franco in Pineapple Express)? He's an Academy Award nominated actor, maybe not when this movie came out, but still, he was in freaking Spider-Man, he was an established actor, there was absolutely no need for him to lower himself into this film. Here's the thing, hes good in it too, or at least he does the absolute best he can. He deserved a much better script and director, this movie was a waste of his talent.

Same goes with Natalie Portman, Academy Award winner, again not when this was made, but still established actress and what not. She plays her part as well as she possibly can too. Plays a good badass warrior chick.. Her romance with Danny McBride's character though, is somehow more retarded and forced than the one between her and Anakin in the Prequels. She does the best she can, but again monumental waste of talent.

There's a few other great actors who are completely wasted in this movie, Charles Dance as the King, who is probably best known now for his portrayal of Tywin Lannister in Game of Thrones. Toby Jones who has always been a great supporting actor is completely wasted in his small supporting role as a minion of Leezar. Justin Theroux (who I recognize from a supporting role in Six Feet Under) is a good actor who again does as well as he can, but this movie is so terrible it brings him down.

I hated this movie. There's really not a whole lot of movies I legitimately hate. But man do I hate this one. Its boring, unfunny, the action is dreadful, the adventure is lame, the story is predictable as all hell, the great talent is completely wasted by a terrible script and crappy directing. It tries to be all edgy with vulgar language and jokes about how James Franco's character may have been raped by some kind of puppet monster thing when he was a kid and most of the jokes are just...uncomfortable more than funny. I didn't laugh once during this movie. The whole thing is a complete waste of alot of talented people's time, as well as mine or anyone who watches it.

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